Now if you have read my first blog post Testimony of a Visually Impaired Author, then you should know that I’m no stranger to hardship and criticism. I’m visually impaired, legally blind, low vision, or whatever the new term is that people think is less offensive to people like me. When I was in second grade, my teacher said in a teachers meeting that I belong in the special ed classroom for children with autism (she basically said I was stupid because I have a vision problem), when I was in middle school, I was made fun of when I joined the track team and had people calling me slow (to be fair, I was kind of slow so that’s nothing out of the ordinary), I went to a CSU for the first two years of college, and the cross country/track coach said my vision made me a liability, and I’ve been berated by customers for being too slow at my job. 

Long story short, I’m used to being criticized, told that I’m not good enough, and I’ve even overheard people talking about how people like me shouldn’t be allowed to be born (disclosure: they weren’t talking about me specifically, yet they did say that people shouldn’t be allowed to have children if they had a high chance of giving birth to someone with a disability). Why am I going on about this? Because as an author, you will be criticized. 

I received a two star review for my book Paranormal Frontier: Wild West the other day, and it kind of stung at first. However, as far as two star reviews go it actually wasn’t that scathing. Her main problem was that I was rebounder by restating things I had already said which added a lot of unnecessary content. She did say that the story was interesting and that she liked the characters though, so there was some encouragement.

What’s the usual response to criticism? Ignore it, fight back and insist they have no idea what they are talking about, maybe accuse them of being a troll. Some people might get so discouraged that they give up. However, the tenacious don’t.

I’m not trying to toot my own horn here. Just trying to make a point. My response was to read the review, take a look at the example she gave, realize she had a point, and then strive to get better. I pulled Paranormal Frontier: Wild West off of Amazon and am in the middle of doing another round of editing with the help of a couple of beta readers to point out the parts where I’m being redundant. 

The way I see it is this reviewer gave me constructive criticism that will make me a better writer in the long run. It still stings a bit, but I actually want to thank her for her feedback. (I also hope that she rereads it after I update the story and resubmits a five-star review, but this is reality, not one of my books). Of course, reaching out to beta readers might’ve fixed this earlier, but I wasn’t very knowledgeable when I first published this book. Didn’t even know beta readers existed at the time.

If anything, this experience has only fueled my determination to be a successful writer. Every criticism I receive might sting, but rather than wallow in despair, I strive to become a better author. I approach the world with a chip on my shoulder to prove the naysayers wrong.

This kind of tenacity isn’t ingrained in me though. It was earned. When I was younger, I was the kind of person who wallowed in despair. I thought that I was destined to fail because of my disability. I thought that my efforts would be fruitless, that dreaming and getting your hopes up was a curse that would just extend my suffering (Don’t get me wrong, there are still some days where I wish I didn’t always get my hopes up because it keeps me striving after things that are out of my control). However, that same ability to keep hoping and keep striving give me the motivation to grow beyond my present circumstances.

There is no getting around the fact that I am limited, much more then most because of my disability. For instance, I can’t drive, because my vision is too poor to pass the sight test. I’ll never be in the NBA,MLB, or any other major sports organization like that because I lack the hand-eye coordination for obvious reasons. Also, I can’t join the military no matter how much I want to (And believe me, that was the only career that appealed to me growing up).

So then, where does this tenacity come from? Some might say it is from my parents who encouraged me to take risks. They lifted me up. I’d say that you are partially right. Yet, there are people with great parents like that who surrender, and there are people with terrible parents who succeed. So, at the end of the day, support does make things easier, and you should always value and seek out those who will support your goals. However, the most important thing is that you make the choice to never give up.

There is an old saying that I have internalized. I’d say that it has become the core of my being. “Fake it to make it.” Deep down I’m insecure, and riddled with doubt. Confidence doesn’t come easily. Every personality test I’ve ever taken ranks me low on self-esteem and self-confidence. I’m what I like to call ‘someone who has earned his confidence’, and that’s because I’m always fight back against that little voice in my head that’s telling me I’m not good enough. Sometimes I have to repeat to myself a dozen times an hour that I am good enough (That’s not an exaggeration. My pre-competition ritual when I competed in track and field in college was to continuously repeat to myself in my head that I was going to reach my goal over and over the entire day even as the gun went off. It worked.). 

The support of others definitely helps. However, the support of others will only be able to lift you up if you are able to carry the majority of the burden on your own.

MJ Maddox
Visually Impaired Author
Underdog, dark horse, and oftentimes underestimated.
Readers: I hope you will be able to take something from this. There is no short cut. The road to success is paved with blood, sweat, and tears. Not a genie in the bottle, wishes upon a star, or magic formulas that they try to sell you in newspaper ads and magazines. Or Facebook ads, Instagram ads, you get the point.